We have begun the process of trying to thank all of the wonderful people who have contacted us in some way to tell us about how our son, Ben Mushalko, impacted their life or to thank them for a service they have provided at this difficult time.

 It has become evident rather quickly that we are likely not going to be able to thank all of you individually, primarily because we don't have enough contact information. This letter is our attempt to convey to you all how meaningful it has been to hear from you and how appreciative we are that you took time to contact us or help us.

Ben made a very tragic decision early in January to end his own life. We will likely spend the rest of our lives trying to understand why he chose this path and, more importantly, why he didn't tell someone he was feeling hopeless and lost. The experience we've had the past couple of weeks with those of you who knew Ben has demonstrated that Ben was surrounded by people who cared for him and would have loved the opportunity to support and help him. He never gave any of us a chance to understand his need.

The kindness, concern and time this university community has extended to our family has truly been overwhelming. Ben had told us of some of this community's "personality;" it is what made UD home for him, particularly the past couple of years.

I don't know if you all can truly appreciate how wonderful you are. The sincerity of your condolences, the impression you left with an out of state relative of ours by walking her personally to her destination on campus instead of just giving directions, the time you took to return Ben's cell phone that he dropped in a parking lot his freshman year, the choir you assembled for Ben's funeral, the outpouring of your grief and the sharing of your stories. These are just the tip of the iceberg of how you reach out. We have even heard from some of you who never knew Ben but were touched by his death.

Outside the confines of the UD community, the world is not so comfortable with reaching out. I hope you are able to understand what a unique personality you have and how much you have touched us by your graciousness and heartwarming embrace.

I have written a lot of words here, but they are inadequate in expressing our feelings toward UD. We are so very thankful Ben was surrounded by so many caring people. For those who were inspired by Ben, we hope you will, in turn, share your humor and your insights with those around you. Ben set a good example in that regard. If any of you are feeling a sense of hopelessness or despair, please do not make the same mistake as Ben. You are among a community who is there to help you. Let them know you need help. It may be hard to find the words or you may feel uncomfortable "imposing." Don't let that stop you.

Professors, continue to inspire a love of learning among your students; knowledge encourages us to learn even more and make our world a better place. Advisers, continue to help our future generation gain insight regarding the paths they are forging. Administrators, continue to support this community in the ways only your position of authority allows so that they can help you do the wide range of work your mission requires. For the broader staff of UD, continue to make this place a clean, safe, welcoming place so the others who benefit from your service can learn to do the same elsewhere. Students, find ways to take advantage of as many of the opportunities UD extends to you to be a good leader and a good student and take the examples you have had set here with you and share them with the world.

It is easy to be cynical, but you are all surrounded by treasures at UD, especially each other. I hope that keeps the cynicism of everyday life at bay, for you all have an important role.

We will never forget all you have done for Ben and for our family and friends. If you have more stories you would like to share about Ben, please do not hesitate to contact us. It helps us, as well, to know how Ben inspired those around him. May God continue to bless this community, and we wish the very best to all of you. Thank you for everything.